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The Tiny Muse(s)

Updated: Feb 5

Don't be misled by the title, because although small in form, these are my greatest teachers. 


Mom and son reading book


"The duality of life" seemed to switch on suddenly when I became a mother. The dance of all extremes is, to put it mildly, a captivating and sometimes overwhelming whirlwind. It is likely the most significant transformation I will undergo in this life, in such a short time. It's a heart-opener that, with the force of the Big Bang, explodes an entirely new life in your face. 


I now understand that this new life has also created a new version of myself. During my pregnancy, for example, I discovered my feminine, gentle side for the first time, which felt like coming home. The words "soft and strong," which grew in dimensions like a mantra, with me for nine months. The first year of motherhood was overwhelming; it was survival, and there was nearly no space to reflect on the undergoing transformations. You're on the baby train, and it goes, it goes, and it doesn't stop at the intermediate stations. Jonah is the clear first Tiny Muse, a loving instigator of profound change. 


The transition from the first to the second year was marked by reflection. I slept again, and dreams started to return. My subconscious whispered in dreams that I had work to do within my self-development. This is when the first steps toward the reevaluation of my "new" life were taken. I turned to Brainspotting, the sister of EMDR. The key difference is that EMDR focuses on cognition, while Brainspotting delves deep into the subconscious. Each session opened a new door, a new room with hidden or forgotten memories. This brings me to the second muse, whom I call Tiny Me.



child getting haircut


She surfaced frequently during these sessions and daily in motherhood, as flashes of memories that vividly wanted to resurface. When we become mothers, we bring our inner tiny with us in the bond we create with ourselves and children. We have the choice of breaking generational curses and conditioning that we've outgrown. During significant changes in my life, I always embraced various forms of therapy as an investment in myself—a kind of tune-up, as my last therapist amusingly put it. Motherhood was one of those moments where I was learning to nourish the Tiny me as much as I nourished my Tiny Jo.


"Becoming a parent is like an invitation to re-learn life." 


Parenthood invites you to experience life through the eyes of your child, to form a new perspective. Easy to say, beautiful words, but with the challenges that parenthood brings, it is anything but simple. This brings me to the third and final muse, easily overlooked in a busy life. These are the Tiny Things in life that set significant transformations in motion. Tiny acts of self-love, Tiny moments of reflection, and Tiny moments of awareness. Important tools to personally carry out a tune-up.


Last year, I had to become my own muse as a single mom. Another catapult of transformation was launched. In times of change and transformation, my mother always says:

"Life never gives you more than you can handle."


A statement that doesn't immediately provide reassurance in the heat of the battle. Yet, once a bit further in the process, I find myself agreeing with her once again. 


It's as if we're thrown into the deep end without swimming experience and have to figure out how to stay afloat ourselves. If we remain calm and surrender, an inner voice tells us that we can stay afloat on our backs without any effort. I don't need to explain what panic does in that situation. I have experienced little to no panic in the past years. The inner gentleness toward myself has laid a foundation of trust, both in myself and in the outcomes of situations. I call this gentleness my feminine intuition. Something I have become deeply fascinated by. My quest brought like-minded muses into my life, whose voices need to be heard and deserve a stage. These women in touch with their feminine superpowers will contribute to filling these pages.


I sincerely hope that The Tiny Muse may be as much a source of inspiration for you as it is for me. 



Columns this season: 


"The female cycle," by hormone specialist and therapist Lavinia Frantzen

"The new moon cycle," by evolutionary astrologer Georgia Takacs

and recurring columns about : "Self-love, whole foods, conscious motherhood and more"

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